Motherhood- Connected By Love, Not Diagnoses

When I discovered I was pregnant, I’d had no thought of having a special needs child. As first time parents, you can image our joy. We shared the exciting news with both sets of grandparents. I found an internet site to show how my child was growing week by week. Then the day came to discover if we were having a boy or a girl.

The day started with a child-like expectation and ended with disbelief. Though we discovered we were to have a son, this joy was dampened by the news our wee child’s growth was significantly behind. There was a problem. After a second opinion, we received another blow. Our child was not expected to live past birth.

Baby in the NICU
Samuel’s First Two Weeks in NICU

The focus then turned to our son’s survival which began in earnest after his birth. Picture being in the Neo-Natal Intensive Care unit surrounded by hoses, wires, and machines. We received dire predictions of our son’s potentially early demise. But God had another plans for our son.

After six months, he came home from the hospital. And with lots of care, he started the journey of thriving year by year. And though we are having a different parenting experience and I know our son has challenges other children do not, I don’t see our son as special needs per se. He is just Samuel to us. Full of joy, smiles, and laughter.

Yes, I belong to a rare club of mother’s whose children face this diagnosis. But, I’d guess, they too see their children not as a diagnosis but through the lenses of motherly love which knows no bounds.

And though we are having a different parenting experience, I don’t see our son as special needs per se. Click To Tweet

Jessy is new mom of a miracle. Her sweet boy Marlon is three months old. And though I wished we lived next door to each other, Jessy lives a half a world away in Germany. The pictures of her son resembles early photos of Samuel.

Connected By Motherhood
Jessy’s Miracle, Marlon
Motherhood Connected By Love
My Miracle, Samuel

As Jessy faces this journey of being a special needs mother, I trust the love she has for her son outshines his diagnosis. She will discover her Momma bear gene, loving her miracle with a surprising fierceness. She will intuitively understand her sons needs and help others to see them as well.

Jessy Motherhood
Little Man, Marlon

Welcome to the club, Jessy. So glad we are on this journey together.

Do we face challenges raising these sweet blessings? Yes. We learn to do other things most parents don’t. We are adept at suctioning at a moments notice. We can change a trach equally fast. We listen to our children breathing. Yes, breathing. Determining from experience, we give a breathing treatment if needed. Our tool kit is different from other parents. But, what is the same is the overwhelming power of love for which we would do anything for our precious gifts.

So, yes, I give myself the title of special needs mom, but, at the end of the day, I am simply a mother.

As we approach Mother’s Day, I hope this blog resonates with you. We are a world full of mothers, not separated by our children but drawn together by them. We are connected by love. I’d be happy to hear about your motherhood journey. Post your story in the comments. I read each one.

Written By: Evelyn Mann

Author, WIP, A Miracle In My Living Room

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3 Thoughts on Motherhood- Connected By Love, Not Diagnoses

  1. That is so amazing. He really does look so much like Samuel at that age. I have come to notice that most children with TD have very similar features, but yet each one just has this amazing personality. I can’t wait to hear more about Jessy. I will be praying for all of these amazing and remarkable children and their families. It is not easy to care for a special needs child, but the rewards are unequaled when you see them accomplish a milestone that maybe others take for granted.

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  2. Your post has me in tears. This resonates SO FULLY with me. People ask me about being a special needs mom, but in reality, I’m just a mom, dealing with life and doing the best I can…like all of the other mothers in this big world. 🙂

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  3. This was quite touching. Each life faces trials and empathy seems to be becoming a lost art. Before I became a mother, I had a beautiful coworker who became one of my best friends. She had a daughter born with a rare condition, who she loves more than anything. Just beyond. Her daughter had facial anomalies at birth, that made it appear as if she had been abused. She once told me that while fending off stares and scowls from people in the market, she had a realization that nobody – not family, friends, or anyone around her – had said, ‘what a cute baby,’ but that her daughter was her world and more than cute to her. She taught me a valuable perspective, and has made me a better, more compassionate mother. Your story will do the same.

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